Why the struggle?

Have you ever felt ice grip your soul?
All the air rushes from you and you're left spirtually gasping. You struggle to believe, to trust in Him, because something so against what you can accept has happened. You try to rationalize it, to justify it, and even deny it. The cold grip leaves your heart as a voice whispers in your mind, a fire boils up and you scream to the heavens. Your soul tears as you release your primal opinion of the injustice and crulty of the world.
As the fire cools, it hardens your soul and you turn your heart against your creator. He created and controls the world, thus He allows such pain and suffering. You begin to struggle, because His preasence is inside you. It's whispering, calling out to you, calling you to trust. You have to choose now, to allow His healing and trust in Him or continue to listen to the lies of the enemy.
You choose Him, your heart knows no where else is safe. A new fire flares in your heart, the rust and rubble burns away, but the fire doesn't stop. It burns down to the core of your soul, seeking every impurity, every dark patch. It is a refining fire, painful and wonderful as it changes something useless and ugly into something incredibly beautiful and perfect.
This struggle will repeat itself over and over until the end of time. Where is our faith? in ourselves...or God. I'm asking myself today.